Procrasintation..

Right now what I should be doing is studying for my 2 mid-terms this week, reading, or memorizing my lines for a play that I'm in at school...but obviously I'm doing none of the above. There's been a lot going on the past few months, still just trying to work through some things and the last place that my mind is right now is on school. I find myself longing for christmas break so that I have a few weeks to relax..well sortof...I'll still be working my butt off at work....but at least I wont have school on top of that.

Right now I'm just really struggling with being happy with my life as it is right now...instead of constantly living in the future...hoping that it will somehow get better. BUT....

I was reminded on sunday at church during the sermon that as much as we may think our lives couldn't get any worse, the reality is...there is much worse that could happen to us then we in western society experience. A statistic that was shared with us was that in the 1990's over 1.7 million people died because of Martyrdom...that's 1/2 the population of Toronto!!!! That number really struck me...as that morning before church I was complaining about a bunch of different aspects of my life...none of which compare to death for what I believe in!

I think I, and probably many others, need to re-evaluate how we percieve our lives and what happens to us, and be thankful for the free Country that we live in.

Stress!

Unfortunately there's a little something in my genes that I've inherited from well...my pop, my mom, my sisters....and others along the blood line...and that is the gift of worrying! We all tend to worry and stress over things that are way beyond our control but we come by it honestly. It has been proven to be a pretty bad thing...from creating ulcers to high blood pressure, overal it just doesn't have a good effect on us, me especially. Over the last month or so I've been really stressed because of a lot of things. Mainly school, work, money, and what the heck I'm going to do with my future. My issue at the moment is that I'm not really enjoying school at Tyndale right now. I'm down to my last year and the options of courses are getting slim and I have all these electives that I have to use up and no interesting courses to take. So this is hard because over the past six months or so I've finally realized what I want to do career wise and well, I'm no where close to it right now being at Tyndale. So I have a decision to make, do I stick it out and finish my degree? (which may take until may 2008 because I have a couple extra courses to fit in) and put off going to George Brown which I'm dying to do? Or do I not finish at Tyndale and hopefully go to George Brown in September and finish my degree when I get around to it. It's a tough call, there's a lot of pros and cons to think about. SO yeah..all that has been on my mind lately among other things. I know I need to lay it all before God and just let him take care of it, but as I said in a previous blog I'm having trouble letting go and letting God take over. I'm working on it though.

I think thats all of my rant for now...

I did it!!!

Well it's offical, I have finally met one of my running goals!!! This past weekend I ran my first 10km race at the Toronto Zoo along with some of my Running Room buddies. Above is a pic of Dave, Me, and Jim just minutes after we crossed the finish line. All of us did it in under an hour which was our goal. I came in at 58 minutes 47.6 seconds and 771th place out of 2200!!!! WHOO! It was probably one of the most exhilirating things I've ever done...I'm sooooo addicted! Bring on the half marathon! I'm STOKED!

Can you believe it's October?

It been a while! I don't even know if anyone still reads these blog things. It's novelty has kindof warn off well for me anyways....and I haven't really had much to say lately. The truth is...I really don't like the person that I've become. I'm not saying this out of self pitty or to recieve any pitty it's just the reality of what's happened. Over the past few months I really haven't been living the way that God would want me to live. The thing is, it's not like I've been out partying, or sleeping around or anything crazy like that, I've just kindof shut God out. It seems to be a bit of a cycle that I go through and it always happens when I try to take control of my life and tell God how I want things to be. And each time I realize that I can't do it on my own and ask God to take back the pen to write the story of my life...blah blah that whole cliche mumble jumble. This time...I know what it is I need to do...but how to do it so that this cycle stops and I stay where I should be? Any suggestions?