The Hardest Thing..

Today has been such a rollercoaster of emotions. It's 12:25 and I can't sleep. I have to be up in 3 hours to get ready to go to the airport, to fly to Newfoundland. Like I've said in previous blogs, this summer has been pretty rough. My job has been really stressful, and over the past few weeks I've gotten pretty sick. I went to the doctor this morning and I'm going for round two of a chest infection and have also been fighting a bad flare up of my ulcerative colitis (Inflamatory Bowel Disase). Anyways, I was advised by a doctor that I needed to stop work imediately and get some proper rest before school in the fall. So...I had to go up to camp, pack up all my stuff, say goodbye to everyone, come home, unpack, repack and get ready to go to Newfoundland. My parents bought me a ticket today to go spend some time with them, my sisters are going too, and to just relax and have a bit of a vacation. As much as I'm relieved that I have the next few weeks to relax and get better, my heart is also breaking because I'm not going to see my kids on monday. The day camp kids hold a special place in my heart, and have really touched me this summer. A few in particular, Zach ( a foster kid, who has been in more homes than he can count on his fingers, yet is one of the happiest kids I've ever met. He puts on this tough act but over the summer got attached to me, and I to him. I'll never forget his smile.) Then there's Haden, the kid who was hyperactive, yet didn't take meds and would bring full bags of marchmallows to camp and eat the whole bag and be bouncing off the walls. And Max, this kid can turn anything he picks up into a weapon. Corey and Kyle, the cutest little skater boys alive, and who can forget Julia, she always has a story to tell. I've been challenged in so many ways this summer, yet these kids have all softened my heart!

At the beggining of the summer I prayed that God would break me, mould me, use me and fill me. And those are all dangerous prayers that I didn't realize jsut how powerful they were until some of them were answered. God has definately broken me this summer, moulded me and used me, and I'm still being filled. I've learned alot though the good and bad experiences:

*leadership is not easy
*communication is key
*everyone needs encouragement
*prayer is powerful
*friendships are so important
*never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game


I think thats about all of my ramblings for tonight...