empty

I feel empty. Camp is usually the place where I feel the closest to God and right now, I'm just wondering where he is. This summer has been my hardest at camp so far, in many different ways. And at a time when I feel I need God really close to me, he seems to be the farthest away...or maybe it's that I'm the one falling away. I'm resposible for teaching the kids Bible on Thursdays.....and it's the lesson about Jesus. And as much as I know the story, and have grown up learning that Jesus died on the cross for our sins, I find it so hard to just express that to the kids in a way that they will understand and recognize the importance of Jesus in thier lives. But how can I teach them about something that I'm struggling with in my own life. I feel so discouraged and keep questioning...why I'm doing this?

I also have alot of other situations going on at the same time, that I'm not sure how to deal with, all of which include my weaknesses and satan pulling at them...trying to get me to stumble.

I need prayer...especially because I'm not that good at it right now. I need strength, and patience, wisdom and self-control.


Until later,

Update

I haven't updated in a while, haven't really had much to say, and I've been so extremely busy I barely get time to do anything for myself. My job this summer is so stressful and I'm finding hard that I don't get the chance to spend time with any of my friends or make new friendships with some of the staff. I am really being challenged though and that is something that I really prayed for at the beginning of the summer. I asked God to break me, and last week that definately happened...I was at the end of my rope and knew the only way to get through that was wth God. I'm learning alot this summer about leadership and how hard it can be at times, but I know that I'm growing in my abilities. I'm still unsure as to if I'm in the right place this summer but I know that God is still using me in this situation. And becuase God is working in me, satan is also working against me.....i'm vulnerable to my weaknesses and have created such drama with certain people and have messed up situations and I'm sick of satan always getting to me. There are a few things right now that I'm really struggling with, prayer support would be awesome. I'm trying to stay strong and just have faith that God has my burdens in his hands.